mom schools me on lesbian fashion

after years of picking out pink ruffly clothing for me and not understanding why i never liked anything she picked out, my mother has evidently turned to ellen for dykey wardrobe support.

since i got to wisconsin, she's been taking me shopping for clothes for tanzania. while shopping one day, she mentioned that i might want to get a jacket for my business casual wardrobe, explaining that ellen wears them. before i had a chance to ask why this mattered, mom explained that ellen is the one she looks to in order to find out what gay women wear. the answer is simple shirts with a jacket, simple slacks, and tennis shoes.

gee, i've always had a hard time picking out clothes - too bad someone didn't tell me before that this is the nouveau lesbian uniform to replace flannels, mullets, and jeans!

i had to explain to my mom that tennis shoes probably wouldn't go over as well for business casual in a social enterprise in tanzania as they do on an american talk show. then again, who knows...